The calendar changes to November, and for most of us, there is a general acceptance that it is, indeed, truly Fall. For some, this is a favorite time of year – brisk mornings and evenings, apple picking and everything pumpkin spice. For others, it triggers the dread that comes with the anticipation of winter – long cold months, snow and ice, darkness and the urge to hibernate until it’s all over, which during this time, is seemingly never!
What causes the winter blues?
It is the lack of sunlight due to the seasonal change that may trigger seasonal depression, also known as seasonal affective disorder (SAD) or the "winter blues,". SAD is a subtype of depression that occurs and ends around the same time every year, typically when the seasons change, and most symptoms begin in the fall and continue into the winter months.
People may struggle during this time with a Vitamin D deficiency, changes in the body's internal clock due to seasonal changes, reduced levels of the brain chemical serotonin, and an imbalance in melatonin that influences sleep and mood patterns.
How does it affects my day to day during these dark seasons?
To the shock of no one, depression affects all aspects of life; from appetite, to sleep, to the ability to get yourself off the couch and into the shower, to the avoidance of socializing leading to isolation – the list is endless. It robs people of the will to do and feel very basic things and has a negative impact on our mental and physical well-being. Our sex lives are unfortunately not immune to the effects of seasonal depression. With the sun setting earlier and earlier the depression-prone may find themselves sulking around in pajamas at 5 pm, sex lives suffer.
Feelings of depression can make people feel numb, gross, even entirely un-sexual. Antidepressants often carry negative sexual side effects, so that, combined with the typical low sex drive that comes from feeling depressed, make it challenging to even have the motivation to engage in sex.
How can I improve my mood and sex drive when I’m affected by SAD?
The first step to overcoming the problem is to address it; this demands active communication with your partner, possibly a therapist, and, most importantly, yourself.
Just as important as improving communication (identifying the problem, exploring it, and talking about it) is boosting self-esteem, depression's mortal enemy. Trying to get comfortable with your body and your self is a lifelong process, but there are exercises to boost feelings of self-worth and body confidence.
For example, stare at yourself naked in the mirror, state to yourself out loud about what you like about what you see and resist the temptation to delve in self-criticism.
5 Tips for Dealing with Seasonal Depression
Here are some tips and traditional treatments to help with seasonal depression.
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Light Therapy
Also called phototherapy, involves a sitting few feet from a special light box to be exposed to bright light. Light therapy mimics natural outdoor light and appears to cause a change in brain chemicals linked to mood. Be sure to follow the instructions with any light you purchase, you usually need to be within a short distance of the light and have it facing you so that your eyes see the light directly. Here’s one on Amazon.
Mental Health Therapy (Psychotherapy)
Therapy (also known as psychotherapy) is one the strongest methods of combating SAD because it helps you build skills that you can used all year round. Here are some of the great things you’ll learn in therapy:
Helping people identify and change negative thoughts and behaviors.
To learn healthy coping strategies, especially with reducing avoidance behavior scheduling activities.
To learn how to manage stresses from work and home life during this time of year.
Mind-Body Techniques
Perhaps overlooked, are the mind-body techniques that can help in symptom management. Consider engaging in relaxation techniques such as yoga, meditation, guided imagery, or music or art therapy.
An easy to do tip is to use our favorite meditation app, Calm.
Who would dispute the mood boosting effect blasting a favorite, upbeat song can have on one’s ability to suffer through household chores?
And let us not forget self-care!
Keep your house well lit, sit closer to bright windows both at home and at work if possible, and enjoy a snuggle session with your partner to stay emotionally and physically connected even if you’re not feeling up for sex.
Take time to do your favorite activities during the winter or pick up some new ones. Here’s a couple that came recommended from other’s in our office here at The Center for Mental and Sexual Health:
Skiing or Snowboarding (Lessons for beginners are usually inexpensive and many outdoor outfitters such as REI have free classes).
Winter Hiking (many trails you’d use during the summer are also available during the fall and winter)
Crochet (start by making some warm fuzzy scarves, which make easy inexpensive gifts!)
Exercise is probably the number one thing that Erika Miley, our owner and Sexologist, recommends. Exercise will release endorphins which give your brain the boost it needs to make the difference between up and down days. There are many videos on YouTube that provide a great, equipment free workout, sometimes in just 15 minutes. We love Peloton’s video workout subscription and The Fitness Marshall on YouTube.
Antidepressants
Antidepressants can be helpful; however, they usually will come with side effects and finding the proper dosage from year to year can be difficult. Work with a therapist and your primary care doctor to find what will work best for you. Antidepressants can have impacts on your sex life by lowering your libido.
There are natural alternatives or over the counter supplements. SAM-e is one that has been effective for some of our clients. That being said, please be very careful with purchasing or taking this without guidance from your primary care doctor and/or therapist.
People are whole beings, so we like to recommend that people work with doctors who practice functional medicine. They look at you as a whole around symptoms you’re having and help you create changes that fix issues instead of just stopping symptoms.
While not everyone can just up and move from their dark home state and migrate south for the winter, take control of what you can – your diet, get some exercise, stay socially connected, communicate, seek medical and professional help if needed, and if possible, plan a (socially distanced and safe) excursion to get some sun!
How do I get help?
Just click the button below to schedule your free consultation because you deserve to have great mental health.