The sexual act when it becomes a compulsion goes from habit to pathology and in a case with growing symptoms can lead to the loss of social life, health, job, and financial condition in three years, according to a psychiatrist.
The movie Shame, by English director Steve McQueen, portrays the story of a man who lives with masturbation and pornography on a daily basis during work breaks and at home. Until the moment his sister moves in with him, she interrupts these habits and drives the character played by Michael Fassbender to despair and madness.
In the beginning, the compulsive for sex manages to organize himself to satiate his libido. "Without treatment, they can no longer work, they don't eat, they don't sleep, and the search for partners takes over their lives. If one partner no longer satisfies, the person goes after others and sometimes pays for sex," said the doctor.
The desire for sex arises regardless of the time or moment. At work, if the "crisis" happens, this person goes to the bathroom to masturbate.
As it gets worse, she leaves in the middle of the workday in search of a partner to have sex with "Then he starts leaving work three times a day to satiate his desire until he is fired.
He spends all his savings on paid sex, loses his social life and relationships," listed the psychiatrist. The compulsive for sex is subject to sexually transmitted diseases, health problems due to exhaustion and malnutrition.
Suffers from sexual and affective addiction. When the problem started to destroy her professional career, she started treating the problem. "Not being able to let go of one person; living risky situations because of it; having sex all the time; focusing totally on one person," she described about her own symptoms. The problem occurred with several partners, she said, with whom she felt a compulsion to be together.
"I neglected my work, all I could think about was sex and being with the person. For me, I would stay 24 hours," she recounted. "I had a lot of losses," she added.
Currently, she attends the group Love and Sex Addicts Anonymous (D.A.S.A.) twice a week, but confessed that she still relapses. In the meetings, Maria reported that the problems, despite having the same strand - addiction to love and sex - are varied.
According to the psychologist, the compulsion arises from a lived situation. "If the patient has already had sex with strangers, this will be the form he will seek, impulsively," he said.
The disease
It is important to distinguish sexual desire from compulsion. The compulsive has no control over what passes through his mental space, he doesn't control his thoughts.
"The desires arise impulsively. The person goes after behaving in order to fulfill these needs," he said. "The sex-compulsive patient gives vent to desires without questioning whether they are socially or individually appropriate.
A person with hypersexuality, on the other hand, organizes himself to obtain pleasure and does not destroy the professional and social life he has, said the psychologist. According to psychiatrists, sexual compulsion is seen as a "disturbance in the metabolism and neurotransmitters that causes the deregulation of sexual activity.
She compared the characteristics of the disease to drug and alcohol addiction. "The estimate is that 2% to 6% of the world's population suffers sexual compulsion. The majority are still men, but more and more cases of women are appearing.
Before starting to discuss any issue regarding sexual compulsion, it is first necessary to clarify that there is a huge difference between being compulsive and really enjoying sex.
The fact that the person has an intense sex life is by no means a symptom of sexual compulsion.
Having a lot of desire for sex does not characterize a disorder. The difference is that the compulsive cannot resist the thoughts and desires, which need to be satiated at the same moment, no matter with whom.
In fact, sexual compulsion, defined by many as nymphomania, is a psychiatric impulse disorder in which the individual has obsessive thoughts and acts involving sex.
This disorder is closely related to anxiety and, not infrequently, to other obsessive-compulsive disorders. "Those who suffer from this problem have difficulty thinking and concentrating on things that are not related to sex. Besides, another characteristic of the compulsive is to act on impulse, without premeditation", he says.
The big problem in dealing with this disease, as explained by the specialist, is the fact that sex involves pleasure. In this sense, the compulsion does not bother and, at first, it does not seem to do any harm.
That is why it is quite common for the sex compulsive to live with this disorder for many years, before realizing that it is a serious problem.
"These people usually only seek treatment when their social life is already totally disrupted, with problems in their family, marriage, and even at work.
Anxiety disorders
And since the compulsive person himself has difficulty realizing that he suffers from an impulse disorder, usually the first ones to notice the symptoms are family members, friends, and co-workers.
"The person begins to present relevant changes in behavior: he/she constantly goes to the bathroom to masturbate, stops socializing with other individuals during free time, and so on
Seger also reveals that sexual compulsion, in 95% of the cases, manifests itself in men and, generally, after the age of 30. To make matters worse, society itself ends up endorsing this behavior, when it considers men who are so dedicated to sex to be manly and macho. In relation to women, this type of attitude is much less accepted.
Is it possible to treat it?
For patients who suffer from sexual compulsion, sex therapy is a powerful tool, which is based on seeking to control the behavior.
So how do I get started on treatment?
To get started, our therapists here are trained and have experience with working through sexual compulsive behavior.
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